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Hoping for a better left

Last week, something broke inside me. The immediate trigger was the assassination of conservative commentator Charlie Kirk. At this point I’m supposed to insert a disclaimer about how I don’t share his worldview, before I’m allowed to say that I found the reaction of certain people on the left extremely disappointing, and frankly quite alarming. I also have to point out that people on the right often react badly to news as well, because that’s how you’re expected to navigate these discussions. You don’t want anyone thinking you’re on the wrong side of history, of course.

A sports car, a Dutchie on a Japanese mountain and a Frenchie next to a Dutch windmill

François never really liked driving. He loves cars, sure, but the act of driving itself always made him nervous. When we visited Sakaiminato last year—a remote town entirely themed around an old anime—he was already sweating before we’d even made it out of the rental car parking lot. But that short trip through the Japanese countryside gave him enough confidence to try again. Since then, we’ve driven in Tottori, Nagasaki, Shikoku, and even once right here in the city, with a giant Ikea package I’d mistakenly ordered, crammed into the back of the rental.

Saved by the bells

People who have read This Autistic Girl Went to Japan, and those who’ve been following this blog for years, know that I moved to Japan in 2022 as a (Startup) Business Manager. But now that the Japanese government has recently decided to overhaul the criteria for this visa, I’ve been getting worried messages from some of you: “Does this apply to you too?!”

Toeps, 41 (yes, really!)

After I told you last week that I was starting to run out of money, you all massively clicked the Kofi button below. It wasn’t my intention to beg for money, but your small contributions are very much appreciated, so thank you for that!

This week I emailed back and forth with my accountant, who turned out to have a good solution for the loan between Toeps-the-person and Toeps-the-company: we can write off the debt against a tax-free severance payment for me as director, which will neatly bring the balance to zero.

I’m out of money

This autistic girl went to Japan, and you won’t believe what happened next: she set up a Japanese corporation, paid a fortune to accountants, lawyers and the tax office, and then watched her bank account hit rock bottom.

The multiverse

Just over a week ago, I returned from the Netherlands. I was there for two weeks, mainly because we had to shoot some videos for the Prikkelplanner*. But since I was there anyway, I also took the opportunity to see my friends and family, photograph four people, record corrections for the audiobook, and interview someone for my new book.

Books and plans

“Hey Toeps, how’s it going with your books?” In this blog, I’ll tell you what I’ve been working on lately and give you a little peek behind the scenes of life as a falling-star author who’s never quite satisfied (the negative spin), or who’s always striving for more and better (the positive one). I’d love to hear your thoughts too, so feel free to leave a comment!

A different pilgrimage through Shikoku – Part 2

Just like in Shimanto, I had booked two single rooms in Takamatsu. Not so much to recharge this time, but because most hotels near the station were expensive, and Toyoko Inn only had single rooms left. For smokers, no less. Luckily, when we checked in, it turned out that 1) this was a brand-new hotel that had only opened two months earlier, and 2) there were still two non-smoking rooms available, which they were happy to switch us to—especially for me, a loyal Toyoko Inn Club Card holder.

It was still too early to check in, but we were able to leave most of our luggage at the front desk, which let us head into the city a lot lighter. Our first stop was a udon restaurant. Udon is the local specialty in Takamatsu, after all. I had been to Takamatsu five years earlier too, and back then, I’d eaten udon at this very same restaurant.

A different pilgrimage through Shikoku – Part 1

Those who walk the 四国八十八箇所 (Shikoku Hachijūhakkasho), or Shikoku Pilgrimage, visit 88 temples in honor of the Buddhist monk Kūkai, covering a route of about 1,200 kilometers. Originally, the pilgrimage was done on foot, wearing a white jacket and a woven conical hat. Nowadays, pilgrims also take the bus or train—though we still occasionally saw a die-hard walking along the highway. The journey takes pilgrims through the four prefectures of Shikoku: Tokushima, Kochi, Ehime, and Kagawa.

We were not doing this pilgrimage, and only visited temple 84: Yashima-ji. Though that was for another reason, which we’ll get to later. While pilgrims collect a stamp at each temple in their booklets, we were collecting something else: Starbucks medallions. In the meantime, we also visited strange, abandoned places, and a castle that wasn’t there.

Bad Romance

This morning, François and I went to the immigration office. After days of preparation, including visits to city hall, a visit to my previous city hall (because I was registered there on January 1st and paid taxes there), hours of form-filling, and even cutting and pasting a document full of romantic photos and our first messages, I thought I had the application ready. Our mission: to change my visa from Business Manager to Spouse of Permanent Resident. More freedom, fewer requirements, and a path to PR for myself in three years. Hey ho, let’s go.

Building Name

Anyone who’s read This autistic girl went to Japan knows that this country can be quite bureaucratic. As a newcomer, you first have to break through the magical triangle of address–phone number–bank account, before you can finally pay with something other than the credit card you were actually supposed to have canceled already, or gift cards from the convenience store. By that time, you’ll probably also discover that you should’ve chosen a different way to write your name, because spaces, special characters, or middle names are guaranteed to cause problems: they don’t fit in the box, or your input won’t make it through verification. And have you learned how to write the number 7 the Japanese way yet? I have—after my direct debit form got returned for being “illegible.” (Tip: no wavy line at the top, and definitely no slash through the middle.)

After all these lessons in 官僚主義, I thought I had it figured out. But when I moved in with François a few months ago, I made a rookie mistake.

Netherlands Speedrun

Two weeks ago, I flew to the Netherlands. I had two speaking events, three shoots, a meeting, and a panel scheduled—and it was a great opportunity to catch up with friends and family.

We got married!

I’m a pretty practical person. Romance isn’t really my thing, and when François asked me a few days ago if I knew when his birthday was, I was off by five days. (He’s the same way—last year, he wasn’t even in the country for my birthday—so luckily, no hard feelings.) I was never really into the idea of marriage. I don’t want kids, I don’t want a big party, and I don’t wear rings. And yet, today, we got married.

Back to the RSS

Why are we all on social media when the best platform for writing is your own? I gave my RSS feed a more prominent place and dusted off my RSS reader.

PR

Last April, François celebrated a milestone: ten years of living in Japan! He’d already studied there before that, but that doesn’t count—at least not according to the immigration office. But now the clock officially hit ten years, meaning he was eligible to apply for PR (permanent residency)!